Charli

For those who are out of the loop, I'm a dad. For those who didn't know there was a loop, I'm a dad. For the unsuspecting stumbler who happens upon this blog (because we know there are thronging masses that search for the things I write about), I'm a dad. Finally. Just in case you didn't get the point, I'm a dad.

Ok... let's pose this as a self-important Q&A session.... I'll act like I was being interviewed by Diane Sawyer or something.

1. Q: Boy or Girl?
   A: Girl


2. Q: What's her name?
   A: Charlize Marianela "Charli" Goode? She's the 4th Charli in her family, but the first girl Charli. We also figured out a way of putting every one of the grandparents names into her name. Charli (Bek's dad), Mari-Anela... Marie is Bek's mom's middle name & Ann is my mom's middle name. Goode... well, needless to say, that's my dad's name. Since that could change, we figured we'd pass along my dad's looks (something like my sister, Deb).


3. Q: How much did she weigh?
   A: Oddly, this question will be highly offensive when she's older. But at the moment, it's not a big deal. She weighed 7 lb 10 oz. and is currently about to breach 9 lb.


4. Q: How long was she?
   A: 22.25 inches. We also had her stand up to tell how tall she was, but we kept getting about 9.6 inches because she'd fall down every time we stood her up.


5. Q: When was she born?
   A: On her birthday. What a coincidence! So was I. When were you born? Okay, seriously. March 29, 2008 at 12:30 PM (that's the daylight one for those who are unsure).


6. Q: Who does she look like?
   A: She's the spitting image of my daughter. It's uncanny! Okay, people are saying they can see the Goode side of the family in her face. If that's the case, I hope she gets Bek's attitude. For those smart-sphincters: if you've ever met my sister, you may be surprised that my side of the family is also capable of producing Goode looks. Granted, it all got spent on her. But proof still remains.


7. Q: How are you feeding her?
   A: Well.


8. Q: No, are you bottle feeding or nursing?
   A: Well, I'm bottle feeding her, but her mom is nursing.


9. Q: Had you ever changed a diaper before she was born?
   A: No.


10. Q: Do you help with changing the diapers now?
    A: Yes. Can you ask better questions? I don't like Yes/No questions.


11. Q: If I ask anything besides Y/N questions, will you ramble as much?
    A: Probably. It's in my genetics.


12. Q: So, what are your thoughts on being a dad.
    A: There's nothing like it. I distinctly remember countless folks telling us, "You'll understand when you're married," & "It all changes when you're married." But when we got married, there were only a few things that changed (moving in together & doin' th' deed - ahem!). We were still friends. The world didn't start revolving backwards for us.
    
    When I heard the same folks saying: "Nothing's the same when you have kids," or "You'll know when you have kids," or "Life will never be the same again..." needless to say, I was skeptical. I was surprised to see that some of what they said was right. Now, the girl is still in diapers, doesn't walk nor does she talk... so her impact footprint is still relatively small. However, I can see some major changes and some changes that will come sooner than I thought?


13. Q: Are you prepped for the "Terrible Two's" yet?
    A: Y'know, I think you get what you ask for. People find what they expect to find. That's why the bible says: "Seek & you will find it." So, we're looking for the two's, tweens & teens to be a pure joy. Now, I'm not so naive to believe it will be all rainbows & roses. First, that would be just gay. Second, learning happens when you have trials. Still, I expect my children to listen to me. But I also expect to discipline my child. It's our responsibility to raise her, not the government or some school teacher.


14. Q: Have you discussed with your wife how you will discipline your children?
    A: Yes! Quickly & severely. I'm not a fan of the "count to three" method employed by so many parents. Now, I'm not saying that I'll snap and start flogging the child. At the same time, I want it to be understood that disobedience is not an option to consider. It has consequences. A swift pop on the bottom will help the child understand to not touch the cookies. The truth is, the tap on the tush is more shock than pain. We have some friends whose son has taken some pretty nasty licks while playing and kept smiling. But you hit his backside lightly with a paddle and a stern voice, the kid wails the scream of torture.


15. Q: Do you believe in spanking?
    A: Yes. But I do not believe in bigfoot.


16. Q: Can I give you a little bit of advice on parenthood?
    A: No. I've seen you and your kids. I don't want kids that act like you or yours.

Well, that about wraps up our interview. I'm working on posting photos, but it may take a while. Not the top priority. I'll show them to you when I see you next. It seems that I pissed off the interviewer. Don't worry, I'll keep you posted.