How do I relate to G_d?

bekster's blog (This is a blog by some friends: Tommy & Becky Brown)
In my circle of blog buddies, I was reading through the blog of an acquaintance... To tell you the truth, it was like reading the lead in to one of Tim's sunday topical studies...

She asks a really good question in her blog... This is a HIGHLY profound question. I haven't read the WHOLE saga... to be honest, I just tuned in to her blog thru Mike Polutta's blog, thru Larry Salley's Blog... and so on...

to boil it down how I read it:

"... my worship by means of congregational singing has gotten really stale and mundane, and I find it hard to focus on what is really important ... This still brings me back to the question of how should I relate to G-d? Looking at the marriage analogy again, since there was no blatantly obvious “falling in love” stage, the “honeymoon” stage was not very passionate."

"How should I relate to G-d?"

Y'know, her question is a just one. I gotta tell ya... it was hard for me to put into words... it still is. How does one relate to one who has so many roles?

• He's a Dad.
• He's a lover.
• He's a disciplinarian.
• He's a homeless person.
• He's down-right confusing at times!

So... How does one relate to this nebulous being in the far blue yonder? Sure, Max Lucado has said that "G_d came near" and we've heard the "stories" of 2000 years ago or more.

How do I relate to G_d?

Now for some hyper-theological Xtians, I think it's fair to say who might comment (though none have so far)... We don't need a hermaneutical study. No overbearing use of greek, hebrew or aramaic (with the exception of Tim Lucas).

Now this is deep water here. Just in the list above, it's easy to see that G_d expresses himself in so many faces. Once we get the grasp on Him as a dad, he pursues us like a star-struck lover... Next, he brings discipline to our doorstep... the next he requiers our help and assistance.

Becky brings the illustration to the "simpler" marriage image... YEAH RIGHT. Okay guys... which of you has figured out your wife's total reasoning? Who among us would DARE say he totally understands the marriage relationship... So, in our confusion of how that works in our "normal" life, now we have to figure out how it relates to G_d.

Becky brings up a GREAT point: If we're to equate a marriage relationship with the Creator, why didn't we "date?" If we did "date," why don't I remember it? When did we fall in love? Assuming the Marriage took place at salvation, where was the "Honeymoon?" Why don't I remember it? And worse: In an Earthly marriage, we at least have the consolation that s/he's wrong as often as I am... It's so Alien to consider that you're never wrong... but never rub it in our face... and you love me anyway.

How does one relate to you, G_d?

How do I relate to you?

Jobs & "Mexicans"

Okay, here's a quick rant... in reality, i'm not going to explore all the economical facets of hispanic day-laborers. However, those who would choose to debate the issue are what i would consider a "whiner." Those who would whine are often those who change only when forced by an external push.

So it seems that there are a great deal of people who say that "Mexicans*" are stealing their jobs by coming to this country illegally... I won't argue that they're entering the country against our current laws which were placed in the previous century. I would argue that those laws are partially the cause of the problem. But i'm not talking law... I want to talk about semantics, work-ethic & drive. Many of our US folks are lacking drive. Why? Because they don't struggle... oh, don't get me wrong, there ARE those in the US that struggle... but our poor are wealthier than some of the middle class in other countries. Our hungry eat more often than some average-joes of outher nations.

When I say they don't struggle, I mean too much is given them. They're so lazy, they will put their hand in a bowl of potato chips, and not pull it out to their mouth... instead, they pull the bowl to their mouth. In truth, they struggle to work. Not that they struggle to FIND work, they struggle to actually push themselves into work. They often complain. They demand higher wages & benefits for the same or less work. They even want 2 days off per week! Pretty soon, they're paid more to do less and don't even do that well.

Enter the "Mexican."

If you were to say they're "stealing" a job; first, i would ask... did you WANT that job? Likely the answer was, "no." But, let's assume that you said, "yes." So you're competing with a "Mexican" to get a job...

1. What do you have to do to get the job?
2. What is the Mexican doing (legal or not) to show s/he is worthy of said job?

We'll start with #1... since that is first. You'd likely have to wake up early, to go to the offices of the job or find the person in charge. You'd have to learn where to go to meet the potential employer(s). Then you have to apply for the job. Let's say that involves grabbing a piece of paper, filling out some jibberish about your history, contact info, etc... Then you have to sit in the meeting dressed slightly better than you normally do and convince the guy you'll make his/her business more profitable based on performance-to-pay ratio.

It's not really much effort. You could likely have 5 job interviews in one day.

So, what is the mexican doing that you're not? Nothing you say? ok, let's start with THEIR application process... i'll list it to make it simple.

1. They wake up... like you.
2. They walk out their front door... again, like you... but this is where similarities end
3. They say goodbye to their kids, again, like you
4. They begin walking... not driving... for HUNDREDS OF MILES
5. They Walk to the northern border of mexico (that's where they're all from, you see!)
6. They climb a fence or sneak in through a rat infested tunnel
7. Then they swim or wade across a river
8. Afterwards, they walk miles across a desert
9. If they survive, they continue hitch-hiking or working their way across the country (note the word "work")
10. Finally, they arrive in the same state you live in and get the job without a paper application

Why? Because their application process started in Mexico. What normal American being would WALK hundreds of miles for a minimum wage job? Few. And the truth of the matter is, most of today's generation isn't worth hiring.

To the "they don't pay taxes" bit... you'd be suprised how much they actually DO pay in taxes... It is estimated that they contribute approximately $11 BILLION into our economy while only costing $2 BILLION... And they RARELY use/employ welfare. They live in small homes with one bathroom... like your Grandparents did. They SHARE with family... like your great-grandparents did. And they complain about as much as your GREAT-GREAT-grandparents did.

In a nutshell...

Shut up and stop whining. Get to work and be worth what you're paid.

*Most people who say "Mexicans" refer to anyone of a hispanic descent who come from beyond the southern most border of the US... besides Mexico, there are more than 40 hispanic countries south of the border.

Staring thru Sunglasses

Tim Lucas of Liquid has gotten me somewhat addicted to listening to U2. I stumbled upon a quote by Bono: "it is impossible to meet G-d with sunglasses on." I don't generally SPELL out "gee-oh-dee." No, I'm not jewish. It's a personal practice.

This creator made some seriously cool stuff. But he made one item that never ceases to amaze me: people. Whether they're in need or wealthy... whether they're arrogant or humble... rude or kind... mean or nice... strange or normal... they're all created in the image of the creator. It's a lot easier to be angry at someone when you don't consider that. I can easily want to see a person suffer when I don't consider that they deserve the exact same punishment I do. Then i have to stop being so friggen cocky (it's a barely noticable trait) and consider the other person through different eyes.

I sometimes tend to walk up to a person who is taking up space and breathing air and approach them as an object that has one of two purposes:

1. Do as I wish or instruct
2. Piss me off

It seems those are the two most popular choices... And with only THOSE two choices, it's not surprising that the second happens far more often than the first.

Now, I'm not simply looking for people to either please me or get out of the way... most of the time. But we all do that. We all walk into a scenario with other people and a set of loaded expectations and a deck stacked against them. The problem is, they are often walking in with an equally stacked deck. It then becomes an others/self sceneario. So why is it so easy to only think about what will affect "me?"

Well, my current answer is: I live with myself 24 hrs a day... 7 days a week... 365 days a year. I have to spend holidays with myself, weekends, vacations, sporting events... i can't even go to the bathroom without myself. Really. Can't a person have some privacy?

We are surrounded with "self" and so little time do we spend with others. It's like ... well, it's like Coach Sal & Jogging. I know the dude runs like 9 million miles a day because he surrounds himself with all the trimmings of a runner. In the same way, we tend to surround ourself with ourself.

When we perform well, we see that as a jewel of our life... We set it on display. We polish it. We prize it. We want it noticed. But, when we don't perform, that's something else to throw into the closet of unforgettable memories. And yet, that over loaded closet has armed guards and is often protected more than our treasured parts. The closet gets full; overflows & spills out so that now everyone is pointing at our faux pas. Our jewel gets scuffed and begins to smell of the rank disgust of our room of disgrace. Now we must over compensate and create confidence out of cocky.

It's tougher to walk into the presence of someone so selfless as Yeshua when my self seems to be such a big part of who I am. Everyone tells us to "be yourself." We spend years trying to "find" ourself. Philosophies make it necessary to "know" one's self.

Now you have this self-proclaimed deity dude saying forget yourself. So we trade freedom with the barrier of cool sunglasses. And safest place to appear without your sunglasses, becomes the most difficult place to go.

With so many Xtians (where x is the Greek letter Chi which stands for Christ the greek word for Messiah) who parade about as if to say: "Y'know, Jesus could have simply pricked his finger and washed my sin away... but he had to DIE because of you." It's easy to forget that they're just as trapped by their sunglasses, too. Almost all of us have a hiding place that we don't even want the Creator to come. Almost all of us have times where we want to wear a disguise in hopes that even our Savior doesn't recognize us. Sometimes it's pride. Often it's fear. Mostly it's guilt. But it's not guilt heaped on by your Father.

Pearls & Pigs

Do you know anyone who has the tendancy to tell you what you "can't" do? They're constantly able to see why you will be incapable of achieving your life's goals. I'm not sure whom to attribute the quote, but i've heard it said: "If you think you can or if you think you can't, you're right!"

It is my opinion that most people are consistently telling you what is/isn't possible because:

• They don't want to feel as if their goals are invalid or less important
• They've given up on similar dreams
• They believe there's some form of magic to successful implementation of a life goal
• They encourage mediocrity as it will keep them comfortable

The word "can't" should have no place in your normal vocabulary. Even to the point that you look for other ways of saying a sentence that would normally have the word in it. It is infuriating to hear children (creations of endless potential) utter the word! Most kids have learned of things that are impossible from their parents. Granted, there are things that are considered humanly impossible. But there are just as many things that are considered impossible by adults just because they haven't accomplished them.

Call me a foolish child, but I've seen far too many people who do the "impossible" with a deck stacked firmly against them! Take Kyle Maynard for example... Here's a young man who was born with arms that stop at the elbows and stubs for legs and deformed feet. It would have been far too easy for his parents to have crippled him with limitations imposed by the perception of his "handicap." [purposely in quotes]. However, is Kyle handicapped? Would he consider himself handicapped? That is doubtful. In fact, I would think he is more capable than many people who have every finger & toe & hair.

Y'see, handicap has nothing to do with hands, but lots to do with one's "cap." It's all about what's in your mind. Your handicap must first start from a mental surrender to the word "can't." I had one guy tell me that I was going to be unable to make money with the stock market. I had a 3rd grade teacher who told my parents that I would likely never go to college (ahem, college graduate here!) and possibly never graduate high school.

There are teachers that tell my wife that some of her ESOL students will need to repeat their grade (this is generally communicated around September – November). Little do they know, many of these students (if they don't drop out from frustration caused by retention) will actually be farther ahead than their peers by the 8th – 10th grade because they're already BILINGUAL. By the way... most bilingual children have DOUBLE THE VOCABULARY THAT YOUR KIDS HAVE SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY CAN COMMUNICATE IN TWO Languages. And most of your kids don't even speak English properly!

Number 1. If you have the Co-Jones to come to me and tell me that I "can't," you'd better have big brass ones to take the verbal abuse i'm going to hurl in your face because I don't believe in "can't."

Number 2. If you tell a kid that they "can't," I hope they grow up to prove you wrong. Then I hope your kids have to go work for them so that it will be an eternal reminder that you believed the lie that you couldn't when another person simply put effort behind their life.

Number 3. The next time you see a Hispanic doing a job you think should belong to an american, STOP COMPLAINING and YOU go apply for the job. You'll get canned because (a.) Their application process started in Mexico! When you're lazy butt wouldn't wake up early to walk across the street to get a job, they woke up and walked thru mexico, swam across a river, jumped a wall, walked across a desert & risked life & limb just to get that job.

Number 4. Next time you see a person who is in the US Military, TELL THEM: "Thank You!" because they made it possible for you to wake up as an American one more day.

Go get the book: Success Is Not An Accident by Tommy Newberry.

The cost of church

Number one: You need to listen to Liquid's Rock G-d series. Needless to say, it rocked. Particularly the last one: How to save a Life.

It seems almost necessary for us as Xtians (Where X is the letter Chi as an initial for Christ which is Greek for Messiah) to proselytize others and do the whole Bait & Switch thing.

It kinda goes like this:

• Make a friend (this can be tough for some, but we'll hit that later)
• Have them entertain thoughts about their inevitable demise (creepy)
• Get them to admit they're wrong (highly necessary in Church, Yeshua didn't do it often)
• Get them to admit you're right (if you don't believe in miracles, well admitting I'm wrong is one thing... Admitting you're right... HAH!)
• Get them to commit to waking up at a new hour on Sunday
• Get them to purchase a new wardrobe of polo shirts and longer skirts for church
• Teach them the lingo (holiness, righteousness, blessings, escatology, baptizo, abundant & joy)
• Get them to sing like you (not much of a "blessing")
• Get them to carry this big leather book
• Teach them the importance of the Big Leather Book
• Get them "saved" in the manner prescribed by your denomination of choice
• Make sure they devote enough time to the "work"
• Guilt them into giving, doing & speaking within spitting distance of you
• Teach them to replicate the process

I call it MLM-Church. Quixtar Assembly. First Amway of His Holy Presence.

Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You travel over land and sea to win a single convert, and when he becomes one, you make him twice as much a son of hell as you are.

Have you ever noticed that it seems to be the Requisite Job of church people to point out what's wrong with every other church and (especially) those not in church. I find this an effective way to make friends: I point out everything they do wrong. Particularly the crowd that does something I (& Jesus) blatantly would disagree with. For example: What if I meet a woman of questionable repute? It is one thing to smile at her in the grocery store and say hello... but i need to make sure that I speak negatively about her reputation as much as Jesus would! Or what about a person who has questionable business morals... they rip people off. I should make sure to NEVER eat with such people. These people have nothing to do with Jesus, church & good polo-shirt wearing company. And yet Zacchaeus & many prostitutes found their way into a family because: Love covers a multitude of sin...

What's worse: when we do get a convert... our own personal one... we make sure that they realize their salvation was a gift... our friendship is not. We beat them up.

Needless to say, it's one thing to see a person come into this Grace-Family... They don't have to work for G-d's love... but they sure as hell have to work for ours. Seems fair.

All that said, Naeem's message at Mosaic was well put:

• Salvation is free
  It will cost me nothing
• Passionately following Christ
  will cost me something

Spend It All, Debt Management or Debt Free

There are 3 major financial approaches in the world today. The first are those who act as a conduit for money to flow from their employer (through their bank account) to someone else's bank. It kinda looks like this:

• Johnny & Suzy go to work
• Johnny & Suzy get paid
• Johnny & Suzy pay their mortgage
• Johnny & Suzy Pay their car payment
• Johnny & Suzy Pay their credit cards
• Johnny & Suzy buy groceries
• Johnny & Suzy buy the latest wardrobe
• Johnny & Suzy buy the latest gadget
• Johnny & Suzy buy a new car
• Johnny & Suzy buy and buy and buy
• Johnny & Suzy buy until their money is bye-bye.

Amazingly, many people have a "live for today" mentality. Nowhere is savings a priority. The only time they give is during christmas, thanksgiving, birthdays & during spurts of guilted generosity. No longer are they keeping up with the Joneses... instead they're flaunting for everyone at the cocktail party. Savings is a word associated with grey and blue haired individuals we've conveniently tucked into old-folks homes & stashed away to lighten our guilty conscience. They live to spend and spend until they successfully spend far more than they initially earned.

National savings (no, i don't have statistics) is at an alarmingly low level. The fact that most live far beyond their means is an understatement. While our people continue to spend their money at an astounding rate, there's no real consideration for "rainy days." In fact, a radio host (Dave Ramsey) quoted a poster found at a Time Share sales presentation: "If you always save for a rainy day, you'll never dance in the sunshine." WHAT??? Is our arrogant culture so short sighted and ignorant as to think that it will never "rain?" Do these people seriously think that there will never be times of lack or emergency?

The honest fact is, these folks are in grave danger of financial ruin. They walk a tight rope over an aligator pit guarded by ravenous wolves & famished lions. They will often experience a major financial catastrophe. Once that catastrophe hits, they become more open to wiser managing of funds.

Debt-Management
The second group of people are equally ill prepared for a rainy day with no stash of cash for a viable emergency, Instead, they will work extra jobs to service their highly leveraged lifestyle if an emergency arises. These people work and spend up to the limit and occasionally cross the limit. Considering themselves highly sophisticated, they toss around financial jargon like Starbucks-conversation. They contribute to a 401k or a Roth and occasionally "bet" in the stock market.

You'll frequently hear these folks talk about their latest toy or mateiral wants. As the holidays roll in, they may mention their giving to show how "financially capable" they are. You'll here them occasionally save up for a vacation or a large purchase, but the savings never lasts beyond the purchase. These folks are comfortably, yet precariously perched over the same aligator pit but still have no safety net. Instead, when they suffer a loss of a job or a financial emergency, Visa steps in and picks up their slack.

Due to their acceptable job performance & work ethic, they're able to get a reasonable job that will hold their financial position. With gifts from family & parents, they've secured their social status with duct tape & elmer's glue. Thre is the rare exception that will gladly give up the comfort for true financial wisdom.

Debt-Free
Living without debt is a totally different thought process. These folks are certain that there will be days of lack. There will be rainy days. The sincere hope is that stressful times will come less often, but they do not ignore the risk of emergencies.

Instead, by preparing for emergencies, they literally reduce most emergencies to minor inconveniences. The more prepared they become, the larger the emergency must be to cause alarm. This is a direct relationship to preparation: Financial, mental & spiritual preparation for life.

Beyond saving for a rainy day, these folks make Giving a first priority. Giving the first tenth to G-d, then being a blessing to those around them. Once these people have saved enough to live a reasonable lifestyle, they become exotic... extravagant... creative givers.

Finally, these folks make well planned investing decisions. Most of these debt-free people become quite wealthy and experience life on a more relaxed term. Like the zone diet, these folks realize that one bad choice isn't the word's end... instead, they are merely one choice away from their financially intelligent life.

We're Expecting!

Hey! go to the company web site:
http://www.goode-design.net

We've put the pregnancy announcement up and 2 ultrasound images.

I wanna get a T-Shirt for beks that says:
"Yes, I'm pregnant. No, I don't want your advice."
It seems every parent on the planet wants to give advice... but i've seen their kids. I don't want those.

Most people who DO give advice at this time in the pregnancy are giving good advice, but one might tell us to use cocoa butter and the other says use cocoa margarin or something... And they get angry if you don't take their advice as if it were delivered on stone tablets from the presence of the most high.

Well, our next appointment is coming soon (about a week from now).
Keep us in your prayers for a healthy baby!

Consolidation!

OK!
i'm going to consolidate many of my blogs into VERY FEW blogs:

1. My news/update/thoughts blogs (Goode Advice)
2. Poetry will stay... it's rarely updated, but it's still a keeper
3. Goode Cents: the money saving blog... many of the same resources are found @ http://www.goode-design.net in the resources section
4. The remainder will stay up, but not be maintained
   • Goode Books
   • Sayings (many will migrate here... i like motiv. sayings & all)
   • DI Seminars
   • Asimov stuff
   • Goode Ideas
   • Etc...

The point is, I don't maintain them. I still want to keep a good archive of "thoughts," but I still may decide to move ALL of it to the Goode Design parent site after a while!

Well. Imma transfer a few things from Goode Sayings here right now!

Goode Sayings:

"...it is impossible to meet G-d with sunglasses on."
-Bono

"If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space."
-Rick Godwin

"'I'm not here to be your friend, I'm here to make you effective."
-Rick Godwin

"F.A.R.T.: File it, Act on it, Refer it or Trash it."
-unknown

"Commit to victory."
-unknown

"What you Hear, you forget... What you See, you remember... What you Do, you understand."
-Coach K

"I do not fear the man who has practiced a thousand kicks one time; I fear the man who has practiced one kick a thousand times."
-Bruce Lee

"Develop your Strengths. Be aware of your Weaknesses."
-unknown

"'Tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."
-unknown

"Talk is cheap. Silence is golden. It's better without your two cents."
-unkown

"You can please everybody sometimes... You can please somebody everytime... But you can't please everybody everytime."
-unknown

"Don't worry. Be happy."
-Bobby McFerrin

"Think often. Decide quickly. Act promptly. Speak sparingly."
-unknown

You can find these quotes in Kyle's book No Excuses which can be bought at kmaynard.com.

"I didn't need to come up with fifty different moves if a series of five would work well enough to get the job done."

"No time devoted to relearning the basics is wasted time, because the basics are essential."

"... countless olympians have been forged off of three or four moves which they perfect."

Thanks for the inspiration, Kyle!
-pete

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask oursleves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?" Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our prescence automatically liberates others.”
-Marianne Williamson

“In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.”
-Yeshua Matthew 5:16 (NIV)

the sweetest revenge is forgiveness
-pg

Becoming debt free requires change in your heart & mind or else all you'll have left is change in your pocket.
-pg

if it ain't hard to do, it ain't worth the doin'.
-pg

Anything worth doin' is worth doin'.
-pg

Just Do It.™
-nike

If you ever see a guy walking down the road, you know the can of fix-a-flat didn't work for him.
-pg

"Forgiveness is a gift that means more to the giver than to the receiver."
-Andy Andrews, Island of Saints

smart is theory but intelligence is fact

live life til it's empty

you never really see a mirror.

a child is the measure of a parent

toupeés: hair today, gone tomorrow.

Say not. Do!
- pg

Even the blind can see the past.
- pg

I am a billionaire... my bank just hasn't realized it yet.
- pg

In action, we may choose wrong; however, inaction is always wrong.
- pg

Find the reality in humor, or find the humor in reality... it's your choice.
- pg

There is no technology greater than determination & will power.
- pg

It is impossible to do what you will not first attempt.
- pg

If words made men great, our insane asylums would lead our nation!
- pg

The greatest mistake: Allowing your mistake to determine your success.
- pg

Success is never achievable, only pursuable!
- pg

Laugh, and it's funny. Cry, and it's pathetic.
- pg

Train your eyes to see the possibilities... then there is no horizon.
- pg

High Schools fill children with wisdom, just ask them!
- pg

Fact: The US is a REPUBLIC, not a DEMOCRACY. Vote accordingly.
- pg

There is a currency greater than your money: your time.
- pg

"If you believe that your choices make no difference, you will make choices that make no difference. However, if you trust that your choices can make a difference, you can change the world."
- pg

"Everyone wants to start something... but few are willing to finish."
- pg

"Either we live by accident and die unexpected or we live on purpose and die in transit... it's a choice."
- pg

"Look on the bright side. At least you'll see what you're looking at."
- pg

it aint the size of the dog in the fight... it's the size of the fight in the dog...
- unknown

"What kind of world would this world be if everybody in it acted just like me?"
- Andy Andrews

"The greatest tragedy in life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins..."
- Andy Andrews

"If you think you can, you can; if you think you can't, you're right!"
- Mary Kay Ash

"Do, or do not. There is no 'try.'"
- Jedi Master Yoda

By Mom
Driving Lessons:
"You got to be careful in parking lots."

Behavior:
"Mind your manners."

House Renovations:
"Never bring a loaded gun into a house... unless you want new carpet."

By Dad
Driving Lessons:
"I've backed up more miles over one way bridges, steering with one knee, looking for a place to pee than you've driven forward in your whole life."

"You can go down the mountain, or you can go down the mountain. We fid'na go down the mountain."

"One of these days, you're going to run the tire off the road. Make sure you don't jerk the wheel."

"No cat or dog is worth wrecking your car and killing yourself over."

Caring for Others:
"I wouldn't trade you for Charlie Watts... but the thought has crossed my mind."

Thinking Before You Speak:
"Son, one of these days your mouth is going to get you in trouble."

Encouragement:
"You can do anything you set your mind to!"

Gun Safety:
"Treat every gun as if it were loaded."

"Most people are killed by 'unloaded' guns."

"Never bring a loaded gun into a house... unless you want new carpet."

Motorcycle Safety:
"Watch to whom you say 'Scooter Trash!'"

Relationships:
"Make sure she's got all her teeth & no tattoos."

"If you're gonna do it, might as well do it right the first time." (i.e. get Dad to weld it.)

Conflict Resolution:
"Shaw-tah-wah-buh! Pick out two!"

"One of these days, I'm gonna put a grey rock to your head."

Diet & Exercise:
"It's on my step one diet."